How Embarrassing

How many times a week do you roll your eyes at yourself and realize that you’ve just committed yet another embarrassing act. Trip over the cat? Totally misunderstand something that was said and respond to the (incorrect) interpretation (to the confused looks of every witness)? Answer a question with food in your mouth and hope that you’ve got it tucked into your cheeks far enough that no one will notice (thanks for the childhood memories, Mom)?

I’ve done it all - I’ve had so many moments in my life that should have resulted in the reddest of faces. But, for some reason, my embarrassment meter is set a bit too high. What would absolutely humiliate the average human doesn’t even phase me. I do have two incidents that stand out as, “I’ve got to hold my head high and pretend this doesn’t phase me” moments.

The first is the cauliflower incident. I believe it was my sister who reminded me of this just a couple of years ago. I was eating cauliflower when someone (I can’t remember who) said something funny. I started laughing, but, because I had all of that cauliflower in my mouth, tried to stifle it. Well, anyone who has tried to stifle a laugh or a cough knows that it just makes it worse. So, I began laughing harder - and within seconds, cauliflower was flying out of my nose. I couldn’t do anything to stop it. And, cauliflower is a bit spicy, so it burned. I don’t have to paint the picture to help you understand how everyone at the table felt as they tried to run for cover. I don’t think that I’ve eaten cauliflower since. I’m sure that I’m scarred. Fortunately, only family witnessed this event, but it was enough. I did learn, though, that you should always have napkins handy when eating cauliflower - it can be messy business. As the boy scouts encourage - be prepared!!

The second incident was a little more public, at a staff barbecue that my mother held. My parents owned the gymnastics club in town and, during the summer, would invite staff over for barbecues. This particular event was to welcome a new coach (who, to be honest, I wasn’t really impressed with, but that’s another story). I remember my outfit well. I’d been losing a little weight and had on a really cute short dress and some cute sandals (sounds like I’m describing a fashion event, right?). Well, I had just come down stairs from the bathroom and walked outside when one of the other staff members came up to me and whispered in my ear, “Kim, your skirt is tucked into your underwear.” What she was really saying, of course, is, “Kim, everyone can see your ass right now.” Inside I wanted to die, I really was mortified. But, I didn’t have that choice. Not unless I wanted to die with my ass hanging out. So, I did what every self respecting person would do. I flipped my skirt out of my underwear, thanked her, and continued on my way as if nothing had happened. She later remarked that she was surprised that I hadn’t been embarrassed - I guess I pulled that one off. Truth was, I was worried that people would bring that incident up at a later date and I just wanted to put it behind me.

So, why do I discuss embarrassment. Well, I think that we allow the fear of embarrassment to hold us back from trying new things. Frequently we choose not to do something “risky” because we fear that we’ll publicly fall on our faces and everyone will laugh. That would be awful, right? Well, not really. Isn’t it worse to never try? I’ve met so many people who choose the safe road and talk about how they wish they’d tried something else when they had the chance. I can honestly say that I’ve tried everything that has been placed in front of me. Do I fear failure? Every day. Have I ever fallen flat on my face? Well, I think that my freshman in college GPA of 1.18 provides the answer to that question. But, I’d rather have my skirt tucked into my underwear as I leave the bathroom, than stay in the bathroom too afraid to leave, any day. And, to those who witnessed the great cauliflower shower - I apologize!! Next time I’ll still laugh out loud, but I’ll make sure that I’m prepared.